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Go away.. Great Thanks~

Happy Mamavation Monday Sista’s~

Well who am I talking about when I say go away? I am talking about the 100lb kid attached to my butt who goes my the name of fat!  I lost 1.6 this week. WoooHooo. Finally. I have been drinking water like a fish and I am thankful to see a loss.  It’s so motivating to see that scale go down. I hope to keep it that way.

Yesterday for me wan’t good. Burger King.. Nuff said!  As some of you might remember my sewer was backed up last Sunday and it happened again yesterday. So this time we just went out and rented a snake thing and hopefully got it fixed ourselves. Then I found pieces of my glasses laying around that my 2 year old has gotten a hold of. So now I have to spend money on new frames. I hope to find the exact same ones so I can just pop out the lenses and put then in the new frames. Ugh.. I really need to be committed just to get a vacation. I haven’t been on a vacation in YEARS. Something always comes up and we just can’t afford to go anywhere.  I am so burnt out.  I keep praying I win a trip somewhere.. anywhere!

This week I am going to continue to drink the water and log my food. I did better at logging but still not 100%. I also want to get to the gym but I need to ask hubby what a good schedule will be. With Cooper not going to bed at night it’s up to us to try to get him to sleep and if I got to the gym everynight it’s not fair on him so I will have to ask what a good schedule will be so I can go. I tried last week to make it and it just didn’t work. I sure hope Cooper out grows this phase.  I need sleep at night.

I am also working on more giveaways. I love helping you guys out.  I have emailed some people in hopes they will donate something for us. The pedometer for tonight was acutally given to me by my sister in law from her work to giveaway. It actually has a radio in it that does work, I tested it all out.  I hope whoever gets it will help them out. I hope to get more for Leah to giveaway.

Well that is about it I think. I hope you all have a great and healthy day!

Frustrated Monday

Well I am frustrated. Now I am not one for drinking water right? So this week with my hydracoach I got a ton of water in. I consider that 100% improved. However I stepped on the scale yesterday morning to what WHAT?!? that can’t be right can it? I step on it again. Holy balls Batman does it say I just gained .2? Yep it sure did. Now .2 is nothing really and I get that. However, I hear all about this water stuff and how it is key to weight loss. Yet I gain .2?  So let me go back and recount my weeks steps? Did I log my food everyday and every bite? Nope I didnt. Did I eat as clean as I should have? Probably room for imporvement there. Did I have some stress? Yep Did I exercise? Well if you consider getting off the couch to go to the bathroom as exercise then sure did.

So given all this how can I have even excepted a loss. Oy. What is my issue? I know I need to get off my butt and move but I just can’t be bothered. I exercise at night and it seems like there is always something that comes up. Like last night and my sewer issue and then my son not going to bed until 10:30. Tonight I have to get a new tire on my car and run and get laundry so not sure I can workout. Oy vey.. Can my life settle a bit so I can get into a routine? Not to mention my knee  is bothering me again(torn ACL for those that didn’t know).

So I am still working the Pete Cohen steps. Today is day nine. Steps I need to work on are to only eat when I am hungry and stop when I feel content and eating slow. I always feel the need to scarf my food to the point I sometimes get out of breath. Who does that right? 

My successes of the week? Well I am not sure I have too many besides getting in more water for the good that did.

What I need to work on? EVERYTHING!!! I have to make time for the gym this week and log every bite that goes into my mouth. It’s a must!

Here is a song that is awesome. Listen to the words and think is this you? I do think it’s me sometimes

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r_rmCeAzqKc

Acceptance.. Why is it so damn important?!?

Last Sunday I attended @pete_cohen motivational web session and we talked about acceptance. Why is this so important? I mean isn’t the only person that has to accept you is really you? I so wish that were true. I am worry about what others think of me it drives me mad. Then of course my mind goes into overdrive as to what they might be thinking like I have ESP or something.  This past week something happened and let me tell you it’s all about acceptance.

My husband folks live in England. They had yet to send any presents for us and my Son for Christmas. No big deal. His Mom then got sick in Jan so she didn’t have time. My hubby’s b-day was also in Jan and they missed that. So he was talking to them over the phone last weekend about getting an iTouch and he was saving his money. Low and behold by that afternoon he had a $300 gift card in his inbox to buy one. Which I think it’s great for him but wait?!? What about me?!? No big deal but come on your Grandson? Nothing not a card not an acknowledgement, nada. So of course this really hurt my feels and all week I have been kicking myself thinking “why don’t they like me” “are they ashamed of me because I am so fat”  “they don’t love Cooper like they do their other grandchildren”

I could go on and on about all the negative things I have been saying. As I write this I am tearing up. Why is what they think about me so important. I mean they are thousands miles away, I never speak to them on the phone, they only call for him, and we can’t afford to visit.  I honestly barely know these people. So why is this so important to me?

Why is it important to you to be accepted? Why do we beat ourselves up over something that we dont’ even know if it’s true.  9 out 10 times it probably isn’t and we are just dreaming up ways to beat ourselves up. So this week has been hard for me. I have turned to food at times. Know why? I know food loves me. I know food accepts me for who I am. Food doesn’t say mean things to me and it’s always at arms reach.  I really need to work on this. Do I really know his parents don’t like me or my son?!? Heck no I don’t. Am I just dreaming it up?!? Probably. How do I stop this cycle?!? No a fricken clue!

Thoughts and Food

It’s hard to be supportive at time when those your are supporting being difficult or if you are being difficult. Right now I have quite a bit of motivation going on. It’s funny but I am actually drinking water. Yesterday I got 63oz in. It’s funny how a little water bottle can make that change. It’s odd but I like seeing my ounces drank go up. LOL  I also think my motivation comes from the Mamvation group as they are all so supportive.  I still haven’t done the exercise part yet. I thought I would be more excited about the gruve but since this is my assessment week I am disappointed about how much I burn in a day. Wait, should I be suprised? I mean I sit at a desk job all day, then go home and sit in front of the TV and move around a bit but no real exercise. So why should my burn average be higher than 371 with no exercise? I guess it’s more of an eye opener than anything.

I am still working through Pete Cohen’s steps. I hope to get my evil mind changed. I am trying to eat slower and chew my food. I do find that if I have to work over my lunch I tend to take longer to eat my food because I have to work. Weird. Maybe I should do that all the time..LOL

Speaking of food here is my food log from yesterday. Doens’t look like a whole lot but I stay within my calories. Processed food is going to be hard to cut out for me.

Monday, February 8, 2010
Breakfast
	Calories	Fat	Carbohydrates	Protein
Mangos, 1.5 cup, sliced	161	1	42	1
	161	1	42	1
Lunch
	Calories	Fat	Carbohydrates	Protein
Quizno’s Classic Cobb Salad with dressing, 1 serving	830	0	40	15
	830	0	40	15
Dinner
	Calories	Fat	Carbohydrates	Protein
Thomas 100 Calorie Engligh Muffin- Original, 2 serving	200	0	48	8
Jenny O Turkey Bacon, 5 serving	175	10	5	10
Egg, fresh, 1 large	75	5	1	6
Kraft Free American Cheese Singles, 2 slice	62	0	5	10
	512	15	59	34
Snack
	Calories	Fat	Carbohydrates	Protein
None
	1,503	16	141	50
	1200 – 1882	32 – 56	163 – 236	60 – 127
d

What a week! Mamavation Monday

Whoa! What a week it has been. Last Sat I ordered myself a Gruve and got it on Wednesday. Then on Friday I got myself a hydracoach and I m in love with that too. Then I have have the best opportunity given to me to do Pete Cohen’s program. Then yesterday I weighed in (keep reading for results)

First off I got the Gruve. The first week is an assessment week where you do your normal stuff and it sets your daily goal. I am somewhat disappointed in the number of calories I have been buring. Now I know I am not exercising at all but I still thought I would be burning more. Let me just tell you I only burn about 500 a day. Really thought it would be more.  So no wonder I am not losing like I want. I need to move it move it!

Then on Friday I got the hydracoach. It basically keeps track of what you drink during the day. Now it told me I needed to drink half my body weight in oz.. ppl I am a big girl and 13o ounces is a lot. So I have set my goal right now to be 75oz of which I have yet to make. Water is so hard for me but I am tying. I like that it keep track for me and for $10 it was a great deal. I actually bought 2 extra for Leah to giveaway at Mamavation TV Monday nights. I feel so blessed to have this group it was the least I could do to help her out.

Now on to Pete. What can I say about Pete that you don’t already know if your a mamavation lady. I feel this guy honestly cares if I succeed. I have to say I feel I get more support from him then my family.  He believes in me and that is so great. I have finally gone through all the steps to begin at day one. Let me just say I think some of the tools are wacky..LOL but make sense. I am big on frozen meals and packaged meats and meals because I have to have convenience me. I am also not a cook and hate to do it so i am not one to make things in advance. That is gonna be the hardest tool to get over.  If you can’t and don’t want to join Pete’s program you can check out some free info at www.weightlossguru.com he truly is awesome! I thank him from the bottom of my heart for giving me this opportunity. I owe you Pete.

So now for my weight in… drum roll……I lost 1.6 this week and that is without exercise. I am so stoked about that. Now I have only lost 5 since Jan 1 but in the last 2 weeks I have lost 3 of that and of course I only discovered mamvation 3 weeks ago.

I will close by saying I am love all of my mamavation sistas and the support they give me. I feel like they are there for me and will push me when I need it. I am so blessed to have found this group and look forward to walking my path with you.

2/1/10 Food Log

I didn’t do too bad. Feel free to look this over and give me suggestions. I take nothing personally. I did manage to also get in 46oz of water in.

Breakfast
	Calories	Fat	Carbohydrates	Protein
Apples, fresh, 1 medium (2-3/4″ dia) (approx 3 per lb)	81	0	21	0
	81	0	21	0
Lunch
	Calories	Fat	Carbohydrates	Protein
Morningstar Farms Chik Patties, Original, 1 serving	140	5	16	8
Village Hearth Italian Bread-2 slice, 1 serving	80	1	15	2
Kraft Mayo Fat Free Mayonnaise Salad Dressing, 2 tbsp	22	1	4	0
Generic Calories-300, 1 serving	300	0	0	0
	542	6	35	10
Dinner
	Calories	Fat	Carbohydrates	Protein
Tai Pai Pepper Beef and Rice, 3 cup	570	18	87	21
	570	18	87	21
Snack
	Calories	Fat	Carbohydrates	Protein
Lenders Wheat Bagel, 1 serving	180	2	35	9
Bruegger’s Bagel Light Veggie Cream Cheese, 4 tbsp	120	8	4	8
	300	10	39	17
	1,494	34	182	48
	1200 – 1550	32 – 56	163 – 236	60 – 127
d

Fat Monday

Every have one of those days where nothing fits and everything feels 3 sizes too small. Well if you have welcome to my Monday. I think I tired on 3-4 shirts this morning and I swear they were kid shirts. I mean I couldn’t have possibly gotten bigger since I wore them right? Well I guess either I have or the dryer shrunk them. I tend to lean to the latter. The shirt I have on feels likes it’s clinging to my rolls for dear life. I keep trying to stretch the shirt out but with no luck it just bounces right back to the rolls. I feel I need to starve today so I can breathe in this shirt.  Oh come on you know you have been there that is why your chuckling? LOL

I did manage to get a gruve this week. I am super excited. I can’t wait for it to arrive.  Maybe that will motivate me to get my butt to the gym. This week I am going to try to make it there even if its just one time. Cooper has been having a hard time at bedtime which makes it hard for me to get to the gym. I used to go at 8:30 when he went to bed but now that he won’t stay in bed it’s getting later. Last night it was 10 before I got him to sleep. Ugh.  But I am going to try maybe on Tuesday to get to the gym for an hour.  Even if that is the only day its something right? I really should check out the EA Active I have. I have never used it.  I also have 2 personal training sessions that I need to use up with my trainer. I wish I could afford my trainer everyday.

Food wise this week I will continue to log my food via sparkpeople and I will step up my water consumption. My friend tells me I have to be rotting inside due to the lack of water I drink.  I just don’t drink anything very often. I have been subbing my lunch and dinner soda with water. Now I know I saw something on twitter about adding the flavor packets to water. While I know plain water is the best I can’t believe that adding a packet to the water is going to kill me. I mean it’s still water right? Its still better than nothing? i don’t like lemon in my water so that is out. So I know that it may not be the best, it’s the best option for me to get in some water. So will continue to add more water this week. I really want a hydracoach but then isn’t a normal water the same. Oh I am so torn on to get one or not. Decision!

Well I do wish you all a great day and a super week! I hope to see one online tonight on MomTv!

Motivation Monday?

Well I didn’t step on the scale this weekend. I was kinda afraid to. I was also really busy that it didn’t occur to me until late yesterday. I didn’t do that great on food this week but it also could have been worse. I managed to only log food a few days but I guess that is better than none.  I need to get more consistent. I also need to work on the water. I am getting like none in. So this week I am going to continue to focus on logging my food and staying in my calories and adding some water in.

Why do I call this motivation Monday? Well it’s the day I get to read all the Mamavation Monday posted from everyone. They are so motivational. It’s all Mom Tv night and I hope to log on and join in the discussion. Congrats to Frugalfemina and lisasamples on being the next 2 Mamavation Moms. I am excited to follow them in their journey and for the motivation.

Well emotionally this week has been a good week. I seem to have a little less negative talk and I seem a bit more upbeat. I think these “happy” pills are a keeper. LOL  I am such an emotional eater so this helps so much. I don’t feel myself turning to food as much. I still not making the best choices but at least the over eating is not happening.

I did have a small non-scale victory. We hadn’t eaten lunch yet yesterday and hubby was starving. I was going to go pick a movie up so he asked if I would pick up lunch. So I drove to fast food place he likes and I got….NOTHING. I went back home and brought his food and the made something for myself. It would have been so easy for me to just pick up a burger and fries but I resisted without much problem. I had made my mind up what I was going to have and stuck to it!!! While this may be just a small detail, it was huge for me. Baby steps I tell you. We have also cut back on eating out which not only helps with the losing weight but all the pocket-book! LOL

So today I am totally motivated to stay on track and make today, just today, a good day! I will worrying about tomorrow, tomorrow!! Thanks to everyone that reads this for you support! Means the world to me.

Progress?!?

Well this week I only managed to lose .4 but I guess considering it is better than up. I have been slacking on logging my food. Why must I do this? I know I already know the answer to that question but it’s such a pain in the bootie to do.  I have done better about making better choices, on some days, but I need to work on being more consistant. I need to think of new things to make for lunches. I am getting tired of the same ole stuff. Might have to look into some idea today.

Well last week I said I wanted to get to the gym, nope didn’t make that. I have been really tired every night. Like heavy eyes falling asleep on the couch at 8pm tired. I don’t know if it’s my new happy pills or what. I take them at night and I know one of the side effect is tiredness but you would think that would have worn off by the following night. One thing I have noticed is that I am a bit happier on my “happy pills” much calmer and I noticed my negative self hasn’t popped up as much. I am just kinda going with the flow and it feels good. It hasn’t been a full month on them but so far they are working or it’s all in my head. LOL

I am totally bummed I am going to miss the Mamavation Twitter party on Thursday. It’s bowling night. If I get home in time I will pop on but I normally get home after 9pm CST so I might get to join the last hour or so. I encourage any Mom reading this blog to join the group if you need the support. They are awesome.  I do hope to make Mom TV tonight (if I don’t fall asleep on the couch) last week was my first time and it was very informational.

This week I am going to just focus on logging my food everyday. Good or bad it has to be done. I might even get out the EA Active and do that. I need to focus on that I am losing and not gaining.